Divorce and Children: Is the Commitment of “For Better or for Worse” Doing More Harm Than Good?

 Posted on October 04, 2016 in Family Law

The decision to divorce is a personal one with potentially long-lasting implications. Many couples struggle with the idea of abandoning their vows. When you add children into the mix, things become even more complicated. There is more at stake, and parents may feel strongly about setting a good example for their children. Yet there are circumstances in which the choice to stay together, “for better or for worse,” may actually do more harm than good.

Abuse of Any Kind Can Be Detrimental to Children

Abuse – whether financial, physical, emotional, or sexual – can be detrimental to children, even if the child is not the target. In fact, one study found that children who grow up in violent homes are affected much in the same way that soldiers are in combat. Their brains become increasingly wary of potential threats, and they may be at a higher risk for mental health problems, such as post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, and/or depression. Furthermore, it is important to understand that abuse can (and often does) escalate over time. Your children could be at future risk of abuse themselves, or they could end up caught in the crossfire. If you are struggling with abuse of any kind, contact our lawyers for help.

Contention, Contempt, and Cognitive Development

Even in marriages that lack abuse but are laden with contention and contempt, children may fare worse if their parents stay together. Though the reason behind this is not clear, a recent study found that children who came from high conflict families actually had fewer adult relationship issues if their parents divorced than if they stayed together. In fact, results indicated that children of divorced parents fared no worse than children who grew up in households that lacked significant conflict issues.

When Your Happiness Matters

If you are in a “low quality marriage” – one where you do not feel valued, supported, or appreciated – you could be at a higher risk of depression, anxiety, and other mental health-related issues. Even more interesting is that your chances of being “happy” actually improve if you divorce. Of course, you do have more than just your happiness to think about, but if you are on the fence, knowing this could be the one thing that tips the scales and leads you (and potentially your children) to a new life.

Our DuPage County Divorce Lawyers Can Help

Whether you are dealing with an abusive situation, or just a lot of unhappiness, our DuPage County divorce lawyers can help. Dedicated to your best interests and highly skilled, we can help you implement safety plans, will handle all the legal details, and fight to protect your rights. Get the experienced assistance you need during your divorce. Call Mevorah & Giglio Law Offices at 630-932-9100 and schedule your free consultation today.